Mal's Content

Ridgehaven Rooster Crows

2008-12-14T22:26:00.003+10:30

And it came to pass that on Saturday night the three wise men gathered to play darts at Tarpeena and they asked a young rooster to make up the four for doubles.
A sign was given that the contests would be a round robin with the pairing first of Oldest and Youngest versus Scottish and Strine and it turned out to be no contest with the first to five being O & Y with the other two a long second. So a second contest was held with Oldest and Strine vs Scottish and Youngest and this was a lot closer but still no contest with S & S winning. So the third match was held and this was a veritable cliff hanger with scores locked at 4-4 despite Scottish and Oldest being in complete control at 4-2 until Strine and Youngest got inspiration from wheat beer or something and Strine actually hit a double ( his first for the evening) to tie the match. Both teams strived for the double but it was Strine and Youngest , in fact Youngest, who hit it first to win the match.
Thereupon there was a great crowing from the Rooster who used to be at Ridgehaven as he was the only one who won all the rounds and all around were awaken to his mighty prowess at darts!
Bugger!

Terrific Tasmania

2008-11-23T10:50:00.005+10:30

No darts last Monday as we had just arrived home from a brief visit to Tasmania. Like Nuran said "its nice to go overseas and still meet Aussies". We saw Launceston, briefly, and visited Cataract Gorge which is behind the town and then on to the high country around the Great Lake on the way to Hobart.
I was focused on fresh Tasmania oysters and no doubt that if you like sea food, and I do, then Hobart is a good place to visit.The docks were picture postcard sort of stuff and the whole place is set in a beautiful location. Mind you we were lucky with the weather and wore shorts all day which no doubt makes everything better. The oysters were sampled and the Tasmania salmon, and the Deep Sea Trevalley and the scallops! Scallop pie for lunch at $3.50 is an indulgence not to be missed before you have that early call from Doctor Death for over indulgence.
Port Arthur is worth the time and the trip down a substandard road to visit. Those wretches must have had no hope once ensconced in one of the coldest places in a very cold place.Yet it could have been a really lovely holiday camp in a different era! The view of the setting from the water with the mountains framing the cove and a still flowing freshwater creek tumbling into the sea would have been worth a fortune if you weren't clapped in leg irons and 16000kms from home.
We lived in style in a hotel right on the waterfront just a stroll to the famed Salamanca Market.
Like most markets it was full of overpriced stuff and socks that don't fit when you get them home! They fit Nuran though so she has a set of winter socks ready to go. The honey she bought isn't any better as it turned out than the one she buys from the supermarket at the same price! Oh well Eleanor got a nice T shirt from the market.
The better shopping was in Launceston we thought and the next time we go, whenever that is, we shall base ourselves there and explore the west coast .If you like fishing then Tasmania is a good place to live, there is trout in the lakes and rivers and bays snuggled in every stretch of the coastline. Maybe in another life!
We bought home live oysters from Barilla Bay all packed for export so allowable on the plane ( in the hold) and they were divided up and eaten by the family once we got back.Even the next door neighbour got a dozen for looking after Banjo and he opened and ate them that night with a stubby of his home brew and was so enthused he phoned me up to let me know how nice they were. So it was worth the effort. Just I shall bring more home next time so I get some leftovers,

Surprise Surprise

2008-11-10T12:00:00.003+10:30

A package turned up in the mail today. From Vega 91.5fm the station I listen to via streaming radio when the nights are balmy and I am half crazy, when Ron turns up to play me at darts and when we are dusting and vacuuming the house. I play it on my own domestic frequency through a usb radio transmitter card.
Anyway I entered the AC DC competition for the launch of their new album in New York, Black Ice, but some of the people who entered had a lot more local exposure to AC DC in the early years and the guy who won the trip for two to the launch had actually watched them in old concert venues in the suburbs when they were a back up band and had a T shirt signed by Bon Scott.
However my reason must have struck a chord as the package contained the new CD courtesy of Vega! So that saves me buying it!
It's playing now over every radio in the house and on the computer speakers.
It's right in their traditional mode.Its like the 90s and hip hop never happened, which they shouldn't have anyway! and will be played the next time Ron comes here!
What's that you want to know the reason why I should have won?
Well they are going to play at my funeral........Highway to Hell!
I plagiarised that from Tony.

Summer darts

2008-11-04T13:52:00.002+10:30

Got a phone call late Sunday to say that the summer darts were starting at the Park Hotel on Monday! Great notice but no worries for a retired man. Or should I say men as Ron was OK to make it too when I phoned him up to let him and Martin know. Poor Martin was working on afternoon shift so had to miss the first night.
There are new organisers this year who do not have the efficiency of Will Leamey but eventually- without the draw sheets and the score sheets and the envelopes for the money and the white board markers for the scores, thank god the boards were stored at the Park, we got under way. With borrowed markers, team sheets from the Millicent Association who luckily run a round robin in their competition and two roped in players to make up the numbers. Still it was fun and the Millicent sheets are better than Wills old ones, in my opinion, and team 2 of which I suddenly became captain owing to all other players taking a step back when asked to volunteer, leaving me with the pen- won on the night.
I paired Betty with me in the doubles and we proved formidable winning 3 out of the 4 games and then one of the roped in players Andrew West played like an A grader, which he is, and in no small measure helped get us over the line. I won half of the singles so held my own just couldn't get both games although I had my chances. I scored a 171 on 271 to stun my opponent in one game and duly pegged out in 21 darts, mind you he had done me earlier by getting 140 on 160 to get double ten when I had stuffed 58 by getting triple 18 instead of the single and then left myself on double 1, so what goes round comes around. Well it did last night. Summer darts that is.
Nuran and Mary were both there and stunned the players when they loudly applauded my peg on double 12, not often done in the summer, applauding that is. Still added to the atmosphere.
The Park didn't know that summer darts had started so the cook had to prepare a rushed supper, which turned out to be the best supper we have ever had there. Some times it is better to surprise. Instead of left over sandwiches we had dim sims, hash browns, chicken wings and party pies.
And a good night.
Today is a perfect day for cutting the lawns, mild breeze to dry the sweat off my brow, the Melbourne Cup is on and the bets have been placed by Len for us as he knows how to do it.
All that is missing is the BBQ but it is goat fried rice tonight so that's not a bad substitute.
Come on Proud Beauty, I changed my mind from Bart Cummings.

Fish and Chips

2008-11-02T11:08:00.003+10:30

We made a trip to the Rocks tavern yesterday evening to test their Fish and Chips out. We had the best plate of beer battered flake since we retired from the fish and chip shop when we visited the Rocks tavern during the darts season and I have been hankering to try it again ever since.
So Banjo was taken to the Mount with us and together we walked around the Blue Lake and then watched cricket on Reidy Park for an hour or so before heading down to the coast. We went via Kongorong to have a look at the old stamping ground when Bill and Jim were playing football down that way and we had the mail run for the area. It looked much the same and it brought back memories of the old run as we motored past their mail boxes. We took a detour down to Pelican Point as the road is now bituminised all the way from Kongorong and then along to the coast past Livingstons Bay where our wooden dinghy used to be moored, well beached, and then into Carpenters Rocks.
The wind was blowing a gale so there was no walk on the beach for Banjo just a wander around as I scoffed a dozen oysters bought from woollies. There is no doubt that the oysters from woollies are better than any dished up in the pubs around here and with a dash of lemon and a stubby of Erdinger a suitable entree before heading into the Tavern.
Our fears were confirmed when the fish was served up. It WAS better than what we used to cook, well at least AS good. Magnificent. Two thick fillets of local flake covered in beer batter,crisped and not oily, lovely chips and all you can eat salads that were as good as Nuran's. Two stubbies of Pale Ale washed the whole lot down and meant that Nuran had to drive me and Banjo home.
Banjo had had his tea too, being tied up to the tow bar but still getting his usual dinner of kangaroo pilaf.
We were a bit early to go to the game of women's basketball at the Ice House, the Adelaide Lightning vs the Bendigo Spirit in a round of the WNBL being played locally, so stopped at the local lawn cemetery to give Banjo a run and see if we could find anyone we knew. We found heaps of people and Banjo disappeared after a rabbit or something , maybe we shall buy a double plot in the Carinya Gardens as its a lovely view from there, not that any of the inmates can view anything but visitors can and we shall be in good company.
Anyway off to the Icehouse where Banjo was left to guard the car and went to sleep whilst we watched an excellent game of basketball. Some of the skills the women showed were superb and the ball flew up and down the court. Adelaide won in front of a large crowd so all in all a good time was had by us and Banjo.
The only downer was when we checked the cross lotto ticket and found that we had the supplementary numbers more times than the main ones. never mind don't want $10 million anyway, haven't got enough time left to spend it.
Just give me fish and chips and a dozen oysters and the world is my pearl.

The meaning of Life or the Life of Malcolm

2008-10-24T19:54:00.003+10:30

Some things never change, warm evenings on the veranda, home brew... when brewed by me, Banjo willing to please you no matter what, Nuran being a fabulous cook and Geelong losing grand finals they should win.
The sun always comes up in the East and then shines for the rest of the day out of my sons arses,until it sets on the back veranda.
So pondering the meaning of life and the exchange rate it occurred to me that we should purchase a prepaid funeral and a plot of land in a cemetery somewhere. I thought Melbourne would be the best place to be buried as at least there someone would come on Mothers day to place a flower on Nurans grave and, maybe. open a stubby on Fathers day and pour it over mine. Better still if we were in a double grave as then Nuran would have her first taste of beer and I would get a flower as well.
And the sight of a stubby being spilt on a grave in the Muslim cemetery would be unusual, which sums up my life.
Anyway it's the weekend and too late to do any more than think about it.
Banjo and I went to Nangwarry today and the ride in the morning was delightful with 'roos hopping away in front of us like a bow wave. The ride back was not so good as it was stinking hot and all the water holes had dried up so I had to go slowly as poor Banjo was feeling the heat a bit. So I washed him when we got home and turned him from a smelly dog to a pampered pooch.
And a cool one too. He of course went ape shit when let off the lead after the wash so I took him over the oval to get the adrenaline rush calmed. He chased the tennis ball with gusto until the circuit was completed then calmed down on the back veranda.Just for once he didn't want to come in to the games room and watch me play darts. Nuran went for a walk and he followed her for company though.
Nothing like a kelpie for keep on coming on.
I threw three 171 with my new darts, just watch out Ron I have the weight now! This put me in a very good mood so dinner was eaten on the back veranda. Beef fried Rice! Just how Nuran does this , cook delicious meals time after time,I don't know but I know I deserve some luck in life!
We went to the dog food shop on Wednesday and Nuran was dressed up like Elle Macpherson and I told the guy she only dresses up for you, he was quite please and knocked 2 dollars off the meat and then said, Mate if I could walk around with a smile on my face after being married as long as you have been I would be happy man! He has heard about how good Nuran can cook from Ralph and also knows a man heart is conquered by his stomach not his ....!
So its been another warm Friday night and all is well.
Who knows why we are are here but its better to Be here than the alternative... Melbourne and the Springvale Necropolis.
For the moment that is.

End of Season cabaret

2008-10-14T12:58:00.004+10:30

The darts season is now over, finalised with attendance at the end of year cabaret. John came over for the event and without him there it would have been an early finish but with he geeing everyone up we lasted until the last dance. Which he had with his Mum, getting her up on the floor after she had stated she was all danced out by me. But John pointed out I was an enthusiastic dancer not a good one and he was both! She enjoyed being danced by a young man for a change!
The band was very loud and saw off Ron and Mary after the generous supper was served, but Ralph stayed on making sure the free beer was not wasted with John showing him the way.
The band invited people to join them on stage in a rendition of Mustang Sally and John was the star in the chorus actually knowing the words! This was followed by Johnny be Good, perhaps a subliminal message to the chorus leader, if it was it was ignored! Ralph was impressed telling Nuran "Now that's my sort of guy".
Anyway I enjoyed myself and the dancing and the beer and the company. So that's the end of that!
Here is a photo of the East Enders and the singles trophy being presented to Martin.
John was absent owing to work commitments!We are all looking forward to next year.

Final Fizz

2008-09-29T19:55:00.002+09:30

A trip to Melbourne to catch up with the boys and to see the Grand FInal Live on a plasma was a good idea, especially when Tony coughed up the gas money. Unfortunately the Geelong footy side coughed up the premiership cup and the trip lost its gloss.
Jim's faith in Hawthorn though, unwavering as it has been seen 1989, was rewarded on the weekend. So what goes around comes around.
A good day in good weather with T bones and Kangaroo steaks and home brew aplenty.
Well I thought I had taken plenty but it turned out 15 long necks was two short of a quota.
Banjo was cared for by next door neighbour Len and looked as fat as the tawny scrawny lion was after carrot stew but a run in the pines stripped the bloat and brought me back to reality. Footy is but a moment in the sun whereas a jaunt in the Pines on a foggy morning with a willing companion is good for the soul. Is there a God out there, if so why the fuck does she hate Geelong so much?
A lovely Sunday roast at Bills and a reminder of the beauty of having grand children 400kms away ,they were both very disgruntled, and a nice cup of tea and then we were on our way home. Nuran was in her usual form," is this Ballarat ?"as we passed through Beaufort and "watch out for the cameras" as we sped at 120kms from Ararat to Glenthompson. Cameras? the only thing on that road to take a photo of us would have me and a few hundred magpies at 7 in the evening when Dancing with the Stars was on. We struck rain from Dunkeld to Casterton, only a passing shower i said. Yeah we passed one shower and then it overtook us again!
Of course no rain in Tarpeena except for the stretch on the shortcut to the Huindred Line Road, where it always rains. So I washed the car this morning and washed the footy season away at the same time.
The Darts cabaret on October 11th is the next big event.... ah life in Tarpeena is so much more gentle than Melbourne, who'd live in Melbourne, only 4 million more people! Idiots!
Who'd follow Geelong... in a Grand Final.... only an idiot!

Final Function

2008-09-16T13:22:00.002+09:30

Last night the members of the East Enders darts team assembled at the South Eastern Hotel to have an end of season meal together and to compete for the East Enders Singles Trophy.
Whilst this trophy does not(yet) have the status of the British open or Wimbledon Championships it is still the highest individual honour available to a member of the East Enders darts team as none of us were good enough to score a trophy any other way in the past season.
The occasion was a good social night as wives and partners and kids and grandkids all turned up to swell the gathering to 17 although most of the extras left when the darts started!
This was a pity as the eventual winner was non other than Martin Moir who defeated Ant. Mathys in the Grand Final and it would have been good for his daughters to have been in the trophy presentation picture. But it WAS getting late although the kids seemed to have more life than their parents when it was decided they should go home to bed.
I personally did not fare well as everyone seemed to make it their objective to beat their captain and all did or at least drew with me. Nuran was getting worried as it appears I would have finished last in the minor round robin but Chris's wife messaged him just as he was about to throw a double and that gave me a chance to win a game and get ahead of him.
Ralph came to the party and threw a three which resulted in schooners all round and Chris's wife phoned again as his two darts fell out and he hit a three with his last one so he had to buy a round too.! She got the blame for that.
All in all a good night.
Martin was extremely pleased with both his trophy and the fact he beat his dad in both games in the round robin. Everyone else felt good about flogging or drawing with me and I felt good for getting two free beers extra!
The players have all pledged their allegiance for next year so it only remains to see if the South Eastern will provide the venue and next season is set.
A good bunch of blokes and their families and a good night for all.
Go East Enders

Out of the Finals

2008-09-06T10:17:00.004+09:30

As the song goes" I don't want to talk about it, how we broke their hearts" well it almost goes like that. And the hearts we broke were the ones belonging to the collective wives who turned up to barrack for their husbands and son playing in the East Enders darts team.
We did ourselves proud in the teams games and headed into the singles 4-1 up needing to win two.
this was exactly the same position we were in during the regular season when we last played the Macs 7 and exactly the same thing unfolded in the singles, needing to win 2 we won 1. This time Ron was the sole winner and I had three darts at double 19 to win the lot, missed left myself double 8 but never got a shot as my opponent pegged 58! Don had nine darts in total to win the lot obviously missing all of them and his opponent eventually pegged the double five he had continually busted up to then! Martin played like a woolly goat and hardly got a shot at a double and Ant and Ralph also went down 2-0. Bummer!
So I went from hero to zero and Don went from zero and stayed there! In our spouses eyes that is.
I had pegged both doubles in the doubles game, Ralph had pegged both doubles in his doubles game and Ant had pegged all four doubles in his triples and doubles game but when the final crunch came we were found wanting.
Still not many finals go down to the last leg of the last single and the watching crowd got full entertainment, small solace!
But the sun came up the same today, I know because I couldn't sleep so saw Old Sol crest the gum trees as I took Banjo for a ride in the fog and Geelong and Adelaide are still in their finals with a chance so "Here's looking at you, kid"
Go Cats!

Into the Finals!

2008-09-02T11:53:00.005+09:30

As predicted we got flogged by the top of the table RSL team, in fact we only won one leg of darts in all five teams games! But the singles were better and we won four out of the six, whether this was because they were looking after their averages or we played freer at least we pegged better this week when we actually got down to a peg. How would you like to be in a Div 2 game that used a total of 26 darts to finish 701! Work that against a divisional cut off aggregate of 16.5 and you can see that the RSL have players that should be in a higher grade and probably will be next year.
I heard one of their players saying he didn't want to play A grade and took him to task saying he only liked winning not playing darts and he should be trying to beat the best not the least.
He huffed off and luck would happen that I had to play my singles against him. Pity for my argument that I beat him! But I think he relaxed after flogging me in the first game and I surprised him with a 61 peg and then he ended up on double one in the decider and I had tops which I pegged Manley style 20 double 10. I actually like double 10! Quick games all of them-
right on the divisional aggregate of 16.5!
Anyway we went as team to the Park Hotel as we were finished by 9.15 to see how the Redbacks were doingas they were playing the fifth side- Taverners.
It was 5-5 and the decider was being played.
The guy that we all dislike for his attitude( see White Knight Blog ) was playing the deciding single and if he won we were in the finals as the Taverners were a game behind us on the table. It looked grim as the Taverners won the first leg but our anti hero played well in the second and got it. So it was down to a deciding leg on which our finals aspirations rested.The Taverner was clearly rattled by our presence and support for the Redbacks and couldn't buy a score and the Black Knight cruised down to the double and pegged it!
So its the elimination final on Friday for us against Macs Seven and another practise night here in Tarpeena on Wednesday. The season is becoming very sociable and whatever happens must be counted a success.
Go East Enders!

Still in the Hunt

2008-08-26T12:38:00.003+09:30

Another close match for the East Enders this time against the Redbacks whom we only beat last time 6-5 with the help of a White Knight from Melbourne.
We were in trouble in the teams game halving the trebles and losing two doubles. Luckily Don and Ant won their double and we went into the singles down 2-3.
This time we played better in the singles and after Don, Ant and Ron had won it needed me to win the last single.
I started on fire and cruised to a win in the first leg and in the second my opponent matched me until I left a double 8 which I proceeded to miss, twice, and he went and pegged 17 by going 15 double 1. So it was 1-1 and the last leg decider got off disastrously for me as I just couldn't buy a treble whereas he seemed to find one every throw. However his love for double 1 proved his undoing as he left himself on it again and that's when I collected my self and hit 80 to leave 27.He missed his beloved double 1 and I missed the 11 hitting a 14, a 5 left double 4 and my third dart pegged!
Much to relief of the rest of the team.....and myself. Unlike last week when I got no chance at least this time I had a chance!
So we are a game clear in fourth spot but did not get much percentage in the win and its the top team next week!The RSL are the Geelong of the Division who have only been beaten once this season.
Go East Enders!
Go Cats!

A little Ray of Sunshine

2008-08-21T15:19:00.004+09:30

Came into the world when I picked up the results for last weeks darts matches. Lo and behold our rival for fourth spot, the Tavern Murphies had also lost. we lost to the bottom side they lost to the second from bottom side!
So we are still alive for the finals!
All we need to do is win next week and our game clear and improved percentage will mean that fourth spot will be ours! Of course that was exactly the same position we were in last week so it's not odds on that we shall win but at least we will have our best team available.
A practice night was held last night, which is starting to be a tradition on a Wednesday night of late although only Don and Chris turned up this time. Chris improved out of sight and actually beat Don in a set of singles, shooting a 22 dart game in the process, but still the overall theme was one of missed doubles. Again.
I got pissed off with throwing 26's so went to the Bull instead of 20, threw a ton never got less than 45 and won the game easily. methinks I shall try that tactic again on Monday night because if you keep hitting the bull they get pissed off quicker than if you are hitting a triple 20! fluke arse and other colloquial expressions were used to no avail. I am inspired by abuse!
Go East Enders!

Thats it Then

2008-08-19T14:13:00.003+09:30

That's the end of the race to the finals for the East Enders darts team. Despite being in a winning position and accruing heaps of percentage its no good if you need two points and go down in the last game and lose the match 6-5. What's worse is the fact that we only needed to win 1 out of the last four singles and lost the bloody lot.
I played the worst singles game of the season and despite that had two chances to win a game and push for the third decider but wired out both times. Don won his first match and lost the next two. Chris won his second match and lost the decider and Ralph got beaten by the same player that had beaten Ron 2-0 in our first round match against this side. The doubles went 2-1 their way and both times we were ahead only to lose the last two.
So rather than thinking finals we can think about scoring the finals!
Unless the team that is rivalling us for fourth spot had a similar brain fade and lost also!.
Hope springs eternal in a losers breast!

Oh Dear

2008-08-12T14:41:00.002+09:30

Faced with a crunch game to ensure a finals berth, the East Enders fell short getting beaten by the Macs Seven 4-7. This was the same scoreline that we had when we beat this team early in the season only this time it went in their favour.
We turned ahead in the teams game after the triple teams of yours truly, Ron and Ant won 2-0 only to be undone by the other team of Martin Ralph and Don losing by the same margin. The doubles went in our favour with the reliable combination of Martin and Ralph winning 2-0 and the surprise one of Chris and me also winning 2-0. However Ron and Ant lost 1-2 so we had the narrowest of margins at the end of the teams games 3-2 our way.
They had two really good players one of whom didn't play against us the first time and the rest were on our level. That is they were until the singles started. Ant cleaned up his opponent 2-0 and is really fine form but Martin just couldn't peg in his game and ended up going down to one of their better players. This was a winnable game which wasn't won. Ron faced off their best player which is the way it should have worked except he was 123 and 145 better than Ron and waltzed it in!
I met a female ex A grader but she wasn't up to A grade level by any means except she could peg. I pulled a 165 on 205 to leave me a double top but never got a shot at it as she went out! Mind you until the 165 my highest score was a 45! The second game was no better from my point of view and she couldn't fluke her trebles this time but once again I missed my double top and she took out her peg. So after pegging twice in the double and once in the triple I couldn't find a peg when it mattered. Another winnable game that wasn't won.
That left Chris and Don playing and both had to win whilst our opponents needed just one of them. Don started well and pegged out a 66 to go ahead but it all turned pear shape for him ( and us) in the next two legs and Chris although scoring level with his opponent just didn't have his experience in leaving a decent peg so got beaten too.
Our form downturn is coinciding with Ron's complete lack of confidence in pegging and even though Ant has clearly taken over as our best player in form we all need to lift a level if we are to be a threat in the finals, let alone make them. I thought afterwards I should have gone for a 180 as the first two were in the triple 20 but I have watched too many Darts DVDs lately and it was instinct to try to leave a peg! But that was me trying to make the most out of a disappointing game.
Next week we play the dead bottom side and Ron will be away so the combinations are limited but I went well with Chris so I shall try that in the doubles again.He has changed his darts ( to one of mine) and scored a lot better.
And there is a practice session at home on Wednesday night where everyone shall be present except possibly Ralph. Don't think we shall learn much but playing darts is meant to be sociable and that's what the team is about.
I shall organise a single champion trophy for the East Enders to be played out on a round robin basis sometime at the end of the season. Only for bragging rights!

Slip, Sliding Away

2008-08-05T22:27:00.004+09:30

There is a song from my era with those words in it and they are the appropriate words to describe the East Enders season. We got trounced as a team 2-9 last night, this despite Don pegging 120 and Ron hitting a 171! Ron went on to lose his singles 0-2 and Don and Ant went on to lose their doubles 1-2. the only saving grace for the night was the fact Ant found form and won in his triples ( with Don and Ralph) and his singles 2-0. The rest of the night was a series of close games in which we failed every chance we had of having a winning peg. A few of the games went to the decider but in none of those were we successful. Perhaps the title should be pegless and legless!
The supper provided by the Gambier Hotel was the best we have had this year and a credit to the Hotel, small solace for the group of ladies that came along to support their men and found them lacking!
Oh well we have a chance next week to redeem ourselves and there is a practice night at my place on Wednesday. Ron and Chris are coming up and Don too , maybe Ralph as well. Martin will be on arvo shift as he was on Monday and we missed him playing at the top although I doubt he could have influenced that many games!
Owing to work commitments the white knight from Melbourne will be unavailable for the rest of the season and I am not planning on being in the grand final yet. What's that they say...."One week at a time"!

Veni Vidi Vici

2008-07-29T13:29:00.002+09:30

Caesar's immortal words rocketed through my mind as the East Enders won their match last night.
More so as I played a good game of singles for a change to secure the win and then Ralph iced the cake by winning his single too. 7-4! and that after losing both triples ( again!). I had the best combinations together too but both teams went down 1-2. The doubles were better although the Mathy's duo failed to win their match the ever reliable combination of Martin and Ralph cleaned up and Ron and I did a job in ours. So we started off needing to win 4 out of six singles to secure the match and Martin went down in his first leg but when someone starts off a single with a 140 it rocks your confidence a bit. Still he settled down and won the next leg on his throw and cleaned up nicely in the decider. Ron played two excellent games and even managed to peg them, which he hadn't been able to do in any game until then, first dart. Don met his match simply because he couldn't get that peg even though well ahead on the scoring but Ant was in good touch and had a close tussle with a very good player coming out on top 2-1. So we needed one out of the next two singles whilst they needed both, the tables had been turned! I had been pegging well all night so was pretty confident in my singles and when I got a classic Keenan peg on 62 I thought it was going to be my night. 6,double 16, double 12! Those readers who play darts know what I was really going for in the first two darts! Anyway the second game was regulation and a 40 peg, not double top but a Manley peg, 20 double 10. Double 10 is fast becoming my favourite peg!
The pressure off of Ralph saw him blitz his opponent in no uncertain manner to ice the cake.
So we stay in the four for another week, even though we had dropped from second to fourth after last rounds upset loss I reckon we will be 3rd now. Not that in a four there is any difference between 3rd and 4th the main thing is to be in the four when the finals roll around.
Go East Enders.

Pipped at the post

2008-07-22T11:28:00.002+09:30

Like the first time we met last nights dart match went down to the last leg of the single for the night, but this time we came up short! Yes the East Enders lost again, this time 6-5 to the Tavern Murphies.
Once again the teams events were dismal with two out of the three doubles losing. For this I should take responsibility as captain as my surprise pairing of Ron and Chris didn't work. This was brought about because Don had the flu and cried off and he is usually the pairing for Chris and I thought I would go with Ant rather than Ron, as Ant and Chris is not a good double pairing either. The star duo of Ralph and Martin is only split when Martin is unable to play because of shift work.
All the games were lost 2-1 so needless to say we had our chances but in the face of some very good pegging out by the opposition were found out short. Once Ron lost his single we were always going to face an uphill climb but were given a big chance when Ralph won his single Martin won and I won needing the last single, as they did, to win the tie. This time Chris met his match but threw well scoring a 140 in the leg he won just to come up short in the last.
Still a good evening of darts and if I shall rethink the double combinations.

Juggernaut crashes

2008-07-16T19:13:00.004+09:30

No number of white knights from Melbourne could have helped us win our last game of darts. I came from Melbourne but wasn't well and played like I later developed- the shits. But that's another story.
Our opponents were simply too classy and deserve to be in a higher grade! Ron played extremely well and won his single and the inimitable duo of Don and Chris kept their winning ratio intact, Don also winning his single but that was all we got out of the night. And the knowledge that the East Enders must be in top form if we are to beat the RSl.
Our lofty position in the top four is now under threat and it will take another winning run if we are to secure a place in the finals.
However on the bright side we only have to beat the RSL once , in the grand final, to win the premiership- no matter how many times they beat us beforehand as long as we get there.
So keep the darts up and the chins too and lets get the juggernaut under way again!
Go Eastenders !

The white knight

2008-07-08T20:10:00.004+09:30

Once upon a time there lived in Melbourne a young man that could play darts. One day he found out that his parent was in trouble as captain of the darts team as his team was to be short of a full quorum for an important game. So the white knight got his mother to put the cost of the fare into his account and rode his trusty train to Warrnambool where is desperate father picked him up in his grey falcon and they both flew back toTarpeena. The Monday of the darts tournament came and the White Knight and his parents along with the gallant Sir Don of Wepar journeyed in high spirits to the Park, well the Park Hotel, and the tournament began. The first joust was a winner for the captain's team with both triple teams winning and the White Knight was full of shit.
However the second tourney began and both the White Knight and the parent's double team lost!
The White Knight got the shits and bought a jug of beer. The captain stayed calm and bought himself a pale ale. Sir Don of Wepar and Chris,his page boy, unexpectedly trounced their doubles opponent and the team went ahead in the games count. This is usually a winning position but unless the White Knight had journeyed from Melbourne and drank home brew and a jug of beer it would not have happened as the captains team would have been one short and in the shits.
So the singles tourney was called and both Ralph the Butcher and Ron the Scot lost...this was as unexpected as Sir Don and Chris his page boy winning... and the captains team was once again cast upon with doom and gloom.
The White Knight stepped up to the oche and promptly wiped the smile off the opposition by beating their champion 2-0 and the captain stepped up to the oche , nearly fell over it a few times, threw more darts in one game than he had previously thrown all evening and somehow fluked a double 1 that evened his tie after being in a precarious position and then beat his opponent in the decider by throwing double top, classic!. The captains team was one ahead and had to win one more with two to go.
Sir Don of Wepar who had shared the jug with the White Knight and a couple of beers with the captain too stepped up to the oche and played the evil humourless bastard from the other side aka known as the black knight or was it Nigel? Nigel had been giving everyone the shits all evening by his demeanour but this only made Sir Don even meaner. The first game the Black knight won by fluking a big peg, or greater skill depending on which side you were supporting but Sir Don was made of sterner stuff, it seemed, and starting hitting triple 19 regularly to be miles ahead and peg out the next game making the black knight even darker in mood. Even Stevens and Chris , the page boy had lost his first but won his second too. The captains team needed one more tie to win- the opposition both and both ties were, well tied!
Sir Don of Wepar had really got the shits up now ,his concentration focused and he played his best game for the season scoring 133 to leave double 19 to win the whole lot.The first dart was a 19 the second a 3 the third a double 8. Hooray!!! The rest of the team spilt their drinks in delight the tie was ours and the Black Knight slunk away to ponder what a fluke arse Sir Don really was.
Chris the page boy met a better opponent and lost his tie in the end but he came away unbowed.
The White Knight had done his job. The team had won and there was drinking and merriment until the small hours.
Next week the Captains team, aka known as the East Enders have to play the top team, who have not lost all season....so far.... and the White Knight decided that a weekend in Melbourne is not worth it with the prospect of playing his role again next Monday. So the captains damsel (aka Mum) is now distressed as she probably doesn't have enough food in the fridge, the captain is worried as he doesn't have enough home brew in the fridge and the hound Banjo is pining because the White Knight gets to all the bones before he does and there is no meat left on them.
Still the White Knight will be needed if the East Enders are to beat the RSL and to organise the jug of beer too!
Go the East Enders.!

Fish and Chips

2008-07-01T14:27:00.003+09:30

The Eastenders had to play at Carpenter Rocks last night, a fishing village in the South East so most of us and our wives went down to have tea there as an occasion. They did a beer battered fish for a reasonable price and upon enquiry the fish was the one and only Flake... and locally caught Flake at that! So Nuran and I ordered the fish as we know that Flake is the only decent fish in batter and our lead was followed by most of the rest. This proved a winner as it was two lovely thick fillets coated in delicious crispy batter laid lovingly over a plate of chips and of course all you can eat salad! And free bread rolls! A bargain at $15. It was the best fish and chips we have had since we cooked our own in The Valley Lake Fish Shop. The salad was as good as Nuran could make, now that's an admission, and the Pale Ale or two went down like ambrosia.
The only thing to spoil the evening was a loss at darts! It was one of those contests where every game went down to the wire and we mostly fell short. I played one of the best games in my second singles after pegging out in 27 darts in the first but the other guy had the darts and the bastard pegged 80 in front of me who had a double top to go! I had the darts in the third and stuttered in the middle when he shot a triple 18 triple 19 and 20 to leave himself double top. I know the triple 18 was a fluke but the other two weren't.I got a 121 to leave top myself but the bastard did me again.
We still had three single ties to play and needed 2 to snatch the match but lost them all so that was the end of the penny section so to speak.
Ron maintained his form but only in his singles as I shifted him down one and Martin was our best player winning at No1. Once again if we turn down in teams which we did, losing both triples and a double (me and Ron), we lose! And next week we shall be one short as Ant is in Queensland and Martin on afternoon shift so it will be difficult to turn ahead in the teams! Difficult but not impossible. Do I load two good players in the 2 vs 3 triple or 2 weaker ones! That is the question I shall ponder all week! That and trying to work out when we can afford to go back down to the sea for Fish and Chips again!

The break is over

2008-06-24T11:15:00.003+09:30

The darts mid season break didn't help us as the gallant Eastenders darts team got rolled unceremoniously by a bottom of the table side! They didn't play inspiring darts so there were no excuses, we collectively were awful and I personally was terrible. Still copping the kick up the bum we deserved for being too cocky and leaving it to the other guy to win, we regrouped to play a challenger- 3rd on the ladder as opposed to us who are second.
A slight change in the triple teams saw us win both for the first time this year and then our usual double format produced two out of the three as victories. It is a poor side that doesn't win from being 4-1 up at the start of the singles as you only have to win two of the six to secure the match. And I don't subscribe to the theory of leaving a good player down as a safety, your better players should beat their better players and carry you over the line. So it was tight when Martin went down in a high standard match 1-2 but Ron won his 2-1 after stuffing up going for 64 in his second game by going two 16s and then double top! Which he hit to bust! And then his opponent rubbed salt into his wounds by pegging straight out on double top. Ron is in top form though and poleaxed the third game to win 2-1. We still needed one match and I stepped up to the oche full of confidence as I had pegged out 3 times already in the teams events. The first game was a no contest as I hit a 117 and several triple 19's along the way but the second game was closer as Jacko hit a 125 himself to put him well ahead and I proceeded to half every double from double top down until leaving myself 5! Lucky he pegged out to save my average. But I had him in the third game with a 117 start followed by a 95 which had him chasing even though he threw a 121 late to leave himself a good chance. However I had watched a darts DVD that afternoon and Taylor had pegged a 74 by triple 14 double 16 and that was what I had left. No worries and no Keenan peg this time - first dart triple 14 second dart a marker third dart bingo! from Zero last week to hero this week. The match was ours. Ralph then put the icing on the cake by winning his single and we all sang Happy Birthday to Ron as it was his 60th that day.
Second position on the ladder is stitched up for a week until we play the new third placed team, The Rock Lobsters at their place.We are turning it into a team dinner and having tea down there before the game as the venues reputation for quality suppers after darts is renowned so surely their meals are good too!Go the Eastenders!

The Lucky Country

2008-06-10T16:29:00.001+09:30

When the 10 pound migrants arrived into Australia, Australia was billed as the lucky country.

Well it was the lucky country alright, it was lucky because people like my Uncle Jeff and Auntie Peggy came to give a better life to their kids. They came from a country in depression wracked by war time debts and thought the sunshine and beaches of Australia would enable their kids to have a lifestyle they as kids could only dream about.

A corollary of this was that other family members would also come as they had a relative in Australia. So it was lucky for Australia that Uncle Jeff came because Australia claimed , well me , and also Michael and Colin and Dianne. And largely I think because of Jeff and Peg. Barbara and Ken came and their children Jane Jean and Brenda. But I came because Jeff and Peggy were my favourite Uncle and Aunt and if Michael wasn’t at 23 Salisbury Hall Gardens then I was at 33 Oakhill Crescent. I think it was Uncle Jeff that gave me the love of bike riding that I still have as I used to join he and Peggy and Michael, on their jaunts around the flat Essex countryside It was flat for Uncle Jeff as he had sturmey archer gears but it wasn’t flat to me on my secondhand bike with a fixed wheel cog and I desperately tried to keep up while he cruised majestically along on his tourer!

When he and Peggy decided to sell up and move to Australia with their family, Uncle Ted was already here to give them a base ,well then I whacked in my application form. I’ll be in this too, I thought , perhaps Australia is really flat.

Well it wasn’t flat and it was bloody hot! But Jeff and Peggy gave ME a base and I found a job. This particular job was unloading 20kg bags of cement off a semi and then after stacking them into the shed at Saunders and Gibbs re loading the lot into various builders utes. This was in February, the temperature was 39 degress on a cool day and I was a pale skinny pom that weighed about as much as a bag of cement!

Uncle Jeff and the people like him were the reason Australia is lucky and also the reason I was lucky to have him as an Uncle, my best ever Uncle, because he looked after me like a son when he saw I was struggling in my job and arranged an interview with his bank manager at the Bank of New South Wales in Gouger St, and from there I got a job that better suited me and I fell in love with Australia.

Uncle Jeff also fell in love with Australia even though he kept an irrational love for rugby and the Welsh Rugby team instead of Aussie Rules and both Michael and his son John played rugby too. I think this was less about the sport and more about the drinking afterwards but Jeff loved his rugby and he loved his garden.

When he and Peggy shifted from 20 Shepherds Road Christies Beach to Inverness Avenue Morphett Vale they did a couple of things right. First they never changed their phone number and I could phone them anytime from memory and secondly they found a plot that didn’t have limestone 3 inches under the surface, I knew the site at Christies Beach was stony as Uncle Jeff spent hours crowbarring limestone chunks out of his new vege patch. I made the mistake, but only once, of offering to help,and came to realize how hard Jeff was working and how cheap the veges were at the supermarket by comparison.

At Inverness Ave they could plant fruit trees roses and have a vege patch that mirrored “The Good life” with grey water usage from the washing machine, remember this was before the drought and such an abundance of produce that they had to buy a bigger deep freeze to store it all. Jeff used to call in to our place at Mount Gambier on his trips to the cray fisherman in the South East whilst working for Safcol and advise me what was wrong with my roses! He never gave me a love of gardening but Uncle Jeff gave me my love of Ford cars.

His first car in England was a Ford Cortina the one with the slope back rear window and I well remember he joyfully picking me up the day I broke my wrist, in his new car to spend the weekend at his place. I broke my wrist by jumping over the wall between our driveway and his car in my excitement to get a ride in Uncle Jeffs car. Uncle Jeff was a bit of a petrol head and planted the foot in front of the Walthamstow Dog Stadium powering up to the Crooked Billet corner. He was taking the long way home to show off his car. I was impressed even though my wrist hurt like hell.

So it was no wonder my first car was a Ford Cortina and the first person to see it was Uncle Jeff. He was impressed but by then he had graduated to a Holden. This was a huge thing compared to his Ford and he drove it with the same zeal .South Road had no limit then and no traffic lights until you got to Darlington. No wonder Jeff loved Australia!

And we loved Uncle Jeff.

We loved him because he was always positive and he embraced my wife Nuran with same love and care that he showed to me. We both loved coming to his and Peggy’s place and sharing in his family’s big moments.

It was a legend in the family that he saw a torpedo go under his ship whilst on convoy and he thought then his number was up, but he cheated death that day and made the most of every opportunity from then on.

Sadly death has now caught up with him but the world and Australia is richer for his being.

He had that wry sense of humour that must have got him through tribulation during the war years and we can only guess how hard those years were for them both.

He got me one day with that wry sense of humour when he arrived at my place one stinking hot day on the way to Michael’s, with Peggys ashes in the car and when he walked in he said” Peggys in the car” and I said in haste well don’t leave her out in the sun then” forgetting that poor old Peggy was in an urn!

Now it’s poor old Jeff that will soon be in an urn and be laid alongside his love, Peggy, in England but I am sure he was contented when he went and pleased that he left behind a legacy of children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.

The large part of my life when I landed in Australia and a large part of my childhood in England has gone but he will live on in my memory and I , Nuran and our kids are grateful that Uncle Jeff was and is a part of our life.

R.I.P

Darts destiny

2008-06-08T20:06:00.002+09:30

Ron and Martin came up for darts and played Don and I in doubles. First to nine and even though Don and I were to a peg in every single game we lost 9-3. So then we played a best of five and lo and behold the home brew eventually took effect and we won it 3- 2, Don doing a Keenan peg to restore some credibility.Nothing like a double 7 double 9 finish to cap off a sociable evening. Mind you Martin did two "Brian's" triple 12 triple 20 single 20 to leave Ron a peg just when we had the game by the short and curly. Sometimes the karma is just against you.I was applauded by Martin for trying a Mardle finish, triple 19 two double tops, got the first double top but got double 5 with the last dart, but it was wasted on Ron and Don who were standing in front of the board trying to work out a score whilst the darts were whistling by. They never got the message either just looking up in astonishment and thinking I had finished the game. Fair dinkum the only good thing was that Don was before Ron so held him up every time he went to throw by standing in front of the board whilst Martin scored. And I followed Ron who stood in front of the board whilst Don scored. No wonder Martin pegged most of the games at least I was scoring for him and gave him a clear shot!
Not withstanding the Moir tactics they were the better double combination on the night when it counted. banjo was happy as he stayed in the games room until 10 instead of 6.30 and got to eat the left over cheese and kangaroo salami biscuits. Oh I forgot to tell Ron he was eating kangaroo, I must tell him the next time he comes up! the sound of him retching will help my concentration no end.

Milestones to millstones

2008-06-03T14:58:00.002+09:30

The East Enders dart team, of which I am the captain, continued it's merry way last night winning 7-4. This was not the walkover that was envisaged by the super confident team as the other team have some good players as it turned out but not enough of them to end up winning the match. And it was with surprise that Martin and Ralph lost their first doubles game for the season2 -1 despite being in a commanding position in all three games. This was offset by our lower combination of Ant and Chris winning their first double of the season. A milestone match. So we turned ahead 4 -1 in the teams and then proceeded to win the first two singles Ron and Martin triumphant. This was the match as you only have to win 6 to win the lot but I lost my first singles for the year 0-2 and Ralph and Ant also got cleaned up so the win only received a polish by Chris triumphing in his single. So the only two unbeaten records in the team have now gone and we can get on with the season knowing that all are fallible.I was onto a peg in both games but she of the tight jeans, that are so admired by Ron; Doris is her name, was too good and pegged each time she had the chance which I gave her.Once again one of our opponents scored a 180 against us. Last time it was one of the Rock Lobsters on board 1 and this time one of Annies Angels also on board 1! Must be the good set up we have! Just that we cant score them!